My Dearest Heart
by Willowstorm9
Summary: A few of the letters that Zachary wrote to Karigan that were never delivered.
1. Chapter 1

Karigan,

Time has never seemed to be on our side. The world has never seemed to be on our side either, for that matter. So much has happened to the both of us and some of it should not have happened.

Some of those have rifts have been my fault and, for that, I can never truly say how sorry I am.

I am sorry for the pain and anguish I have caused you, but I want you to know that I am fighting with all I am to protect you from harm and not just as your king from here on out. I never wish you to be hurt in my name again.

I wish to tell you that I fought as hard as I could to… I dare not utter those words for a dam will be breeched and I will never be able to go back to what I was.

Please say you forgive me, Karigan and met me atop the astronomy tower tonight.

I will wait all night for you.

Zachary


	2. Chapter 2

Karigan,

I understand why you did not show last night and no matter how much I try, I will never be able to make amends.

But I have to try. You deserve every happiness. Please Karigan. Give me a chance. I only want your happiness even if it does not include me.

I want to to see you,. Please meet me in my study tonight and let me apologize in person.

Zachary


	3. Chapter 3

Kari,

Everytime I see you in my personal prison, I want to fall to my knees and pour out my heart to you. I am in agony that we cannot be together. I want to give you the world and lavish my undying love on you. It is the least I can do to atone for the sadness I see in your eyes.

I curse the fates that put us into such a position.

You must know that I do not care that we were born worlds apart. I know, in my heart that we were meant to be together.

But I hear the fates laugh at me as I gaze longingly at you and I feel their pull away from you. I know my duty but heart longs for you.

I want you and you alone.

I understand and accept your wishes to never be alone with me. I won't ask you to meet me again but I will request a letter or anything to know it's not just me who feels like this.

I await your response.

Zachary


	4. Chapter 4

My dearest heart,

I cannot stand how close we together are and we, we cannot be together. How I long to hold you in my arms, to feel your heart beat against mine. I long to solely belong to you.

But, it cannot happen. Though I see the stolen glances you throw my way when you think I cannot see you, your continued silence keeps me from pouring my heart to you. I respect you, my heart.

I just wish for some sign besides the sidelong glances and beautiful blushes that you feel the same. Surely, you can see my eye in my eyes for you are all I see.

Please tell me I am not wrong.

With bated breath,

Zachary


	5. Chapter 5

Ride G'ladheon,

Perhaps I was to forward with you and my overt written affections. You are under not obligations to return my feelings if you do not feel the same. No matter the wish in my secret heart.

I am sorry for causing you stress if I did. I mere wished to know your heart and you to know mine. I do not want us to have any secrets between us even if we cannot be together.

But I will wait until you are ready such a thing. I will wait forever if I have to.

Zachary


	6. Chapter 6

My dearest Love,

On the eve of your fateful journey, I wish to implore you not to go! It is not just for myself that I must ask you to decline such a mission, but also for this beloved country of ours. We need you.

There is little chance of you coming home and I could not survive it, knowing it was me that sent you into such peril. The country would be worse off if you were to accept this mission.

I love you, Karigan G'ladheon and even if I will never be able to publically and formally give you my heart, it belongs to you and always will. I hope that one day, you will be able to accept my love and I yours. I shall work toward that goal to keep me sane while you are gone.

I pray desparately that you will return to me safely.

Know that you take my heart you and you always have.

I only wish I could have saved you from this terrible ordeal.

I love you, my dearest heart.

Yours Always,

Zachary


	7. Chapter 7

To my dearest Kari,

I wish I could see your face one more time. I wish I could see a smile light up your face, adding a breathtaking twinkle to your eye. Such eyes that sparkle in any light, for any reason.

There are times when it is almost too much to be near you. Every time I see you, my love for you wells up in me, urging me to you, telling me to take you in my arms and never let you go.

I swore to myself that I wanted to protect you, but I have broken it countless times and it kills me every time I do. I cannot stand seeing you hurt because of me. It breaks my heart whenever I see you in pain.

However, I cannot give preference to you, even though you have done so much for this country and me. You have done more than enough.

My heart lingers with you when it should move on, for I know we can never be together, but I will find a way. If you feel the same.

Please tell you do.

Zachary


	8. Chapter 8

Kari, my love,

I will not hesitate anymore. I must tell you how I feel. I am yours completely, body and soul, and I want to love you until the end of time.

Please do not complicate our time. We already have lost so much time because others have tried to dictate my life.

Can we not live for ourselves now or are we to suffer our whole lives because of others whims and wants? I wish for us to be free, as free as a wild stallion, galloping across the hills.

I will not ask you for anything until you are ready. I tried that once and I will be forever sorry because of it.

I am forever yours even if we ca never truly be together.

My heart is always yours and always has been.

Zachary


	9. Chapter 9

Dearest Kari,

I know you have no wish to talk with me in such an informal manner, your continued silence has made that clear, but I need to clear the air between us.

There is no easy or private way to say this. I suspect that even my letters are read by other parties. No matter how careful I am.

Karigan, I love and, not just with lust as I mistakenly implied that one night, but with all that I am, was, and will ever be. I love you with all my heart.

Please believe me, Kari. I only want your happiness and I want to be the man to do it. I want to be the one who put the smile on your face, but I respect your silence.

If you feel anything towards me, as I think you do, please give me some sign. I will always fight for you. Always.

Zachary


	10. Chapter 10

My only Love,

I have fought for you in ways you wouldn't understand. My love is true and whole though you will never accept it.

It breaks my heart Kari, that you do not see how broken I am that we cannot be together. I need you and only you.

Though much stands in our way of being together, I will continue to fight for you as hard as I can.

We both deserve happiness and I can only find it with you.

I love you

Zachary


End file.
